I'm sure, I'm real sure.

On this day, April 10, 2012, Chauncey is a distinguished gentleman. #250k (Taken with Instagram at Bell Canyon Trailhead)

Oh, the irony. Learning about nutritional health is destroying my mental health. I am preparing for my third advanced human nutrition exam. I am considering this to be a break. My brain is fried. I have a 10 page, single-spaced, non-cumulative, double-sided review sheet along with a melange of flash cards. Now what do the flash cards consist of? Sink your teeth into this example:

Vitamin A: Fat soluble vitamin/antioxidant.

• Sources: liver, eggs, dairy, dark green, orange, and deep yellow fruits and veggies that are high in beta-carotene (Vitamin A precursor)
• Active forms: Retinol: Alcohol form; reproduction. Retinal: Aldehyde form; night and color vision. Retinoic Acid: Acid form; growth development, cell maturation and defferentiation
• Functions: antioxidant: prevents Low-density lipoprotein (LDL) oxidation, promotes healthy vision, bone growth, reproduction etc.
• Deficiency disease: Xeropthalmia, irreversible hardening and drying of the eyes, bitot’s spots, conjunctival xerosis, keratomalacia, blindness/night blindness
• at-risk populations (deficiency): Urban poor, elderly, alcoholics/people with liver disease, individuals w/fat malabsorption, preschoolers with low veggie/meat intake
• toxicity: FATAL, acute, hypervitaminosis A, teratogenic-may result in birth defects and spontaneous abortion (3x RDA consumed).
• Disease relationship: increased Retitnol levels correlate to increased loss of bone mineral density (BMD), Antioxidant-decreases risk for cancer and heart disease. 

This is a single flash card. I have about 30 of these gems to commit to memory by tomorrow at 10 AM. If you see me tomorrow, I will probably be a zombie due to the liquefaction of my brain. I think i miss calculus and physics right about now. Oh, the grass is always greener.

#NutritionMinor #WorstReviewExperience #GoodFridayPoorlySpent

Observed a conversation between my friend and her 6 year old daughter today.

“mom, what’s a ‘wack (rack) city chick?’”

“um….a not very nice girl.”

“oh. Well i’m not very nice sometimes. Does that mean I’m a wack city chick?”

“No no no! It’s not a good thing to call people.”

That’s just the laugh I needed to cheer me up from an avalanche of papers.

Oh children. I love them! hahaha! 

#rackcitychick 

This is one of Amy’s “study aides” #ScrollOfDeath (Taken with instagram)

Hello stranger! Welcome back from your break. I hope it was good and restful and drama-free. Oh wait…..your life is always crazy!

         -Amber (My boss)

Ha! 

“they are made to look shady so you feel shady!

it’s all part of the state legislature’s anti-not-mormon plot!”

                 -Alex Gilvarry

This morning, at 9 I took my first exam of finals “week”. 15 multiple choice, 10 fill in the blank and an essay questions. It took me all of ten minutes. VICTORY! Then I realized I would have to wait 3 hours until my next class. 

Then, at 12:20 I listened to countless adults bitching and moaning about the final TAKE HOME OPEN BOOK exam which is actually a simple straightforward essay. Their complaint? Its 7-9 page requirement. I cannot believe it. It is SO incredibly difficult to write 7 pages in 3 weeks. Especially when half of it is feedback on the book and reflection of what we liked and disliked about the class. I cannot believe our terrible misfortune. 

Welp, suffice it to say, I am feeling incredibly good about my work ethic and study habits since I was relieved to see the requirements for our final instead of dislocating my jaw in shock and subsequently begging for a smaller page requirement. 1 exam down, 2 presentations and 2 exams to go.

A few somethings actually,

SO my classes. I’ve neglected them and haven’t given them the attention they deserve. Or so i thought. My online classes this semester have been the bane of my existence and they frustrate me. What with their deadlines falling on friday and saturday nights and me scrambling to finish them to go to a movie or book club or dancing. Comparatively, I am beginning to think I am an ok student because it turns out that everyone else is worse! I thought that I was awful and lazy, but it seems that actually completing the work with some degree of care has rendered me responsible and noteworthy. (ok, maybe not necessarily responsible…)

Yes, both of these online professors have asked if they can showcase multiple writings of mine as examples for future classes. At first I thought, oh great, my work was so abysmal that they’ve decided to show people what not to do. Not so! I have somehow consistently received perfect marks and feedback such as this “your work is impressive!” and “well done, i look forward to reading more of your insights on future assignments!” and “excellent work! Insightful analysis and incorporation of class materials”. From thinking I would get a B or something to perfect scores? Relief. Seriously feeling blessed right now. 

Not me that’s for sure. Unless survival is counted as a victory. Last night I had a new experience. I was either graced with the stomach flu, or food poisoning. Having had neither before, I can’t say which for certain. So that, I will leave up to interpretation.

In addition to having killer immune system, I had been blessed with the magical ability to keep food down. Or so I thought. I hadn’t puked in upwards of ten years and I had successfully forgotten what it felt like. Last night I was reminded. About 26 times. I realize now why God has given me good health; I am an awful invalid. I whine and cry and complain and puke and whine some more. 

My body aches all over and I am either freezing or my temp shoots up to 103 without notice or cause. How do people do it? I just don’t understand. And Nothing makes you feel like a child more than camping out with a blanket in the bathroom at 3 am with people bringing you tums and crackers and water just for you to throw them up all over again. Ugh.

Welp,Here’s to good health, I hope none of you get the flu ever again. If you do, I will sympathize and commiserate and bring YOU tums and crackers and water; hopefully you can keep them down better than I.

So, I for some reason, consistently wait until the eleventh hour to write my papers. Literally. They are always due at midnight, and I always wait to start them until 10:45/11:00. Why do I do this? I have no idea. I actually have tried to write and submit them in advance, but to no avail. I had nothing to do this morning. Absolutely nothing. Except for that paper. I did try! I sat down arranged some articles and then, nothing. No words, thoughts, feelings or anything came to mind. SO naturally, I decided to dance and listen to music and watch Serendipity. I then proceeded to clean my room, do laundry, clean the bathroom, go to a meeting and then work. I did make a rough outline of said paper before the meeting though! 

I came home from work at 9:45. Plenty of time to write a 5 page research/interview paper right? Well, an hour later and nothing. at 11:20 or sometime thereabouts, I began. It was going swimmingly. I was cruising along, 4 pages down and then I checked the time. 11:52. A page left; a paragraph and a conclusion missing, not to mention 2 more citations that needed to be strategically placed within. Panic. 

Never fear, I wrote that last paragraph and the conclusion in under 6 minutes and turned in that ol’ exam paper with 2 minutes to spare. I do not want to repeat that ever ever again, but let’s be honest, it’s me. It’ll happen again and not just once. I haven’t missed a deadline yet though! Maybe it’ll take a fail and not a near miss to change my mind.